How To Give Your Partner A Massage
How do you spoil your partner with a massage without ending up with sore hands?
We asked a couple of Ripple’s therapists and here are their top tips.
- The easiest way to spoil your partner with a massage is to do a head massage. And make it easy on yourself so you aren’t reaching up and getting sore arms in the process.
Ask your partner to either sit in front of you on the floor and massage that way, or alternatively lay their head in your lap and relax while you massage. So how do you do it? There are some easy techniques that they will LOVE.
2. Use heat packs to warm up the muscles before you start, will make it much easier to loosen them up. Or ask your partner to take a warm shower first.
3. The first is to put the tips of your fingers spread out on the scalp and then firmly and slowly rub the scalp in small circles. Try to keep the pads of your fingers in the one spot when doing this as it will feel better.
The key here is to do it slowly, if you rub fast then it will only irritate your partner. Slow down, the slower the better, less is more. After a minute change the positions of your finger tips.
4. Ears – yep, I know this one sounds weird but most people love it. In a circular direction, start at the lobes and work your way up.
5. The all time favourite, the shoulders, neck and upper back. This is usually where people hold tension. Do firm massage into the shoulder muscles and especially the trapeziums from the neck to the shoulder. Massage firmly the neck, especially down the sides. Use a little bit of oil so you don’t “burn” the skin.
6. Use your forearms. A beautiful move that will have them begging for more is to place the fleshy part of your forearm over the trapezoids muscle (it’s the big one that goes from the neck along the shoulder and is tense in most people).
Then lean your weight on it for 5 seconds and then release. Super easy, feels fantastic.
7. Use your elbows instead of your thumbs – press into the fleshy muscles in the shoulders and release
8. Break it up – everyone wants their shoulders massaged but a couple of minutes of that will make your arms ache. Massage feet, hands and arms in between to give your arms a rest.
9. Feet Super easy, but remember to keep it firm or it will feel like tickling instead. Rub your knuckles up the inside of the foot, massage the toes, gently massage around the ankle. Use the reflexology thumb walk (see here) for the soles of the feet. Just remember to keep it firm.
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10. Calves – if she is on her feet all day, and especially if she wears heels, this is a really great way to massage. Buy a scented massage oil from your chemist (or Ripple does sell massage oils online) or at worst case get some sunflower oil from your supermarket (this makes a great massage oil as long as its fresh).
Sit your partner in a comfortable chair, maybe with a glass of wine, and slowly and firmly massage their calf muscles. Often just a squeezing motion is a great way to relax these muscles, or even gently rubbing your hands up and down the lower legs.
11. Hands – this is the easiest and best part it can be done anywhere. Gently massage each finger, massage the palm of the hand, and then gently on the back of your hand, rub your thumbs up the centre of each knuckle, starting from the knuckle and moving up towards the body.
12. Arms – does your partner sit in front of a computer for much of the day? Might be that their forearms are really tight. Take your forefinger and thumb, thumb goes down the top of the forearm (starting at the elbow) and fore finger down the bottom, and “strip” the forearm. Use just a little bit of oil but not too much.
13. Get a massage yourself and during the massage try to remember some of the things the therapist did that you loved. Or sometimes there are day courses you can do that teach you the basics of massage.
14. Alternatively, you can book a couples massage with two therapists at the same time. These don’t have to be expensive, but are a nice way to relax together.
How To Do A Massage On Yourself
“Doln” literally means self-massage, and involves a combination of different techniques to improve the circulation and flow of Chi throughout the whole body.
Chi or Qi being the life force energy within every living thing derived from traditional Chinese therapy and also martial arts.
- When doing any self-massage prepare yourself by gently shaking all your limbs, and body.
- Shake your arms and hands to release any tension in your upper body.
- Now gently shake your legs and feet as well. If you’ve ever done any self affirmation in the past you’ll know by simply thinking and reciting an affirmation and performing these simple actions is healing in itself. Place your feet shoulder width apart and unlock your knees. Straighten your back to allow optimum energy flow, relax your shoulders and close your eyes.
- Take a minute to focus internally, and get in touch with how you and your body are feeling before starting the Doln routine.
- Empty your mind of any disturbing or distracting thoughts…this is not as easy as it sounds but with practise it really works.
- Bend your knees slightly and imagine a string passing through your spine, straighten up your posture to allow for better Chi flow breathing deeply.
- Keep breathing deeply to align your Chi. Ultimately, from home what you want to achieve is time for self, this can be done through yoga and meditation but often we don’t get time to attend scheduled classes.
- With your fingertips tap the top of your head
- Slowly work your way all around the head, covering the sides, front and back. This exercise will wake up your brain and stimulate blood circulation
- Pull your fingers through your hair, this stimulates the bladder and gall bladder meridians on the top and side. (This is also great to do in the shower when massaging shampoo and conditioner through your hair, imagine you’re at a salon and give yourself a good head massage)
- Place your fingers on your forehead, and apply a little pressure and stroke out from the centre to the temples
- Bring your fingers up to your temples. Drop your elbows, and massage your temples, using circular movements
- Massage down the side of your face until you reach your jaw
- Squeeze along jaw bone, working outwards from the centre. This is a very good technique for trying to relax
- Using your index finger and thumb, squeeze your eyebrows starting from the centre line and move slowly and laterall
- With your index finger and thumb, pinch the bridge of your nose and corners of your eyes
- Apply your thumbs to the sides of your nose. Breathe in as you stroke down the side of your nose.
The above routine is particularly good if you feel a cold coming on, or have one already. Although Doln exercises are specifically designed for self-help, the can just as easily be carried out on another person. The above routine will ease discomfort and speed recovery.
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Author Biography – Ali Saoirse – BEc University Sydney, GradDipPsych Bond University, Diploma Remedial Massage, Certificate IV Massage, Level 7 Kahuna Massage, Qualifications in Pregnancy Massage, Hot Stone Massage, Aromatherapy, Reflexology from Gold Coast TAFE.
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