- Use heat packs to warm up the muscles before you start, will make it much easier to loosen them up. Or ask your partner to take a warm shower first.
- The first is to put the tips of your fingers spread out on the scalp and then firmly and slowly rub the scalp in small circles. Try to keep the pads of your fingers in the one spot when doing this as it will feel better.
The key here is to do it slowly, if you rub fast then it will only irritate your partner. Slow down, the slower the better, less is more. After a minute change the positions of your finger tips.
- Ears – yep, I know this one sounds weird but most people love it. In a circular direction, start at the lobes and work your way up.
- The all time favourite, the shoulders, neck and upper back. This is usually where people hold tension. Do firm massage into the shoulder muscles and especially the trapeziums from the neck to the shoulder. Massage firmly the neck, especially down the sides. Use a little bit of oil so you don’t “burn” the skin.
- Use your forearms. A beautiful move that will have them begging for more is to place the fleshy part of your forearm over the trapezoids muscle (it’s the big one that goes from the neck along the shoulder and is tense in most people).
Then lean your weight on it for 5 seconds and then release. Dead easy, feels fantastic.
- Use your elbows instead of your thumbs – press into the fleshy muscles in the shoulders and release
- Break it up – everyone wants their shoulders massaged but a couple of minutes of that will make your arms ache. Massage feet, hands and arms in between to give your arms a rest.
- Feet! Super easy, but remember to keep it firm or it will feel like tickling instead.
Rub your knuckles up the inside of the foot, massage the toes, gently massage around the ankle. Use the reflexology thumb walk (see here) for the soles of the feet. Just remember to keep it firm.
- Calves – if she is on her feet all day, and especially if she wears heels, this is a really great way to massage. Buy a scented massage oil from your chemist (or Ripple does sell massage oils online) or at worst case get some sunflower oil from your supermarket (this makes a great massage oil as long as its fresh).
Sit your partner in a comfortable chair, maybe with a glass of wine, and slowly and firmly massage their calf muscles. Often just a squeezing motion is a great way to relax these muscles, or even gently rubbing your hands up and down the lower legs.
- Hands – this is the easiest and best part it can be done anywhere. Gently massage each finger, massage the palm of the hand, and then gently on the back of your hand, rub your thumbs up the centre of each knuckle, starting from the knuckle and moving up towards the body.
- Arms – does your partner sit in front of a computer for much of the day? Might be that their forearms are really tight. Take your forefinger and thumb, thumb goes down the top of the forearm (starting at the elbow) and fore finger down the bottom, and “strip” the forearm. Use just a little bit of oil but not too much.
- Get a massage yourself and during the massage try to remember some of the things the therapist did that you loved. Or sometimes there are day courses you can do that teach you the basics of massage.
- Alternatively, you can book a couples massage with two therapists at the same time. These don’t have to be expensive, but are a nice way to relax together.